Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Progress so far in breaking up my relationship with Doc
I think I am doing well. I saw Doc yesterday as I was standing in the lobby talking to one of the ailing residents about her back problems. He made sure he said hi and went on his way. He has not called and I have not talked to him since I made my video which has gotten hits quite fast. I guess people are interested that I have finally moved on after complaining about his drinking in so many of my videos.
I talked to Jeff last night about their night of drinking which resulted in a somewhat physical altercation, as Doc says Jeff threw his recorder against the wall and broke it when he foolishly (his words) said he was recording him. Jeff said he told him once, "Go home, Jeff, it is time for you to go home!" Jeff did not take kindly to this command since Doc was as drunk as he was. I told Jeff Doc got so agitated he called all night, but I did not respond. Jeff said he knew it would turn out bad. Yes, bad things may happen when two guys like Jeff and Doc drink together. Doc is prone to insulting analysis once he loses all sense of caution, and Jeff is too hot tempered to hold on to his control when he is very drunk. Doc knows this, so he was taking a risk when he asked him purposely to come and drink with him, after about a year of swearing off that 'drinking buddy' friendship.
Jeff lives on my floor so I make a point of talking to him once in a while, as he is a serious insomniac, and I think he holds on to his temper better when he can vent once in a while.
So last night he and I rode down the elevator and out into the patio to look at the progress of the swimming pool renovation. A couple of guys were out there in the chairs and I introduced Jeff to them as the 'swimmer of the Westward Ho.' He always does at least 100 laps when he swims. Nobody else even comes close. This guy is an athlete so needs plenty of exercise to keep his equiliberum.
I think it becomes a matter of survival in this complex where you are surrounded by people who may lose emotional control at any time to figure out how to be friends without making anybody too mad. That takes some tall doing, since you cannot allow yourself to be intimidated by bad behavior either. That is a sure recipe for living in an atmosphere of fear.
I also had a very lively discussion out under the trees with two black guys. I sat there with them and the woman who does not care for me a whole lot, and wondered how I could get a discussion going with them, and some sort of connection. I decided to use Harriet Beecher Stowe and Uncle Tom's Cabin to start a talk about the politics of today. When I introduced the subject the woman threw a mini tantrum and got up and marched off like I was committing a crime. She hates my efforts to get discussions going. I did not let that stop me as nothing was happening. As soon as she saw that the two black guys had responded and, indeed, had a lot they wanted to say about a black man as president, she came back over and entered the discussion. I think she is a democrat and just could not resist.
I try not to go out to the patio too often so she can have time out there without me trying to start a discussion. I think she has been too reclusive to appreciate my efforts.
One of the black guys is young and personable but nearly blind. The other is retired from a long time job as a cab driver. He especially love to talk. I already knew that from other encounters with him, or I might not have been so bold. He kept saying that never in his wildest dreams did he think a person of color would be elected president in his lifetime. I told him that I had seen my black grandson take on more confidence when people tell him he looks like the president. I think he feels validated as he never did before. I think he always felt too different in appearance, growing up in an all white family.
So I already think my reading of Harriet Beecher Stowe is bearing fruit. I copied and pasted my review in my newspaper blog G4Life. If you notice the headlines on AzCentral News on my blog list, you will see reports of extremely violent events on there quite often. In fact, I have been somewhat taken back by how many violent events occur in Arizona when you see these headlines encapsulated day after day.
Yes, I perceive that discussion is badly needed lest we perish or suffer a serious curtailment of our freedoms due to the violent people in our society. The time is past where we can just ignore them and be certain of our security. I think we all have to take action now and then to keep the peace in our communities. Otherwise the disturbers of the peace will eventually outnumber the passive peaceful. We have to be active keepers of the peace!
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