Sunday, May 31, 2009

"Georgiana" Duchess of Devonshire and inveterate gambler transports me to the 17th century in a masterful biography

I want to talk about reading books and why I think they saved my life so many times. I was feeling so down, with Doc sick, etc, and picked up this biography I had bought but not read. I had had to give up on finishing "Alaska" because it was a thousand pages long stuffed into a little paperback and the print was killing my eyes. Well, this book written by Amanda Foreman won the Whitbread Prize for biography in England and I can certainly see why. Her telling of the life of this woman is so smooth that it is as though you are right there seeing the life they lived in front of your eyes. Many biographers intrude with a style that constantly reminds you of their presence as they struggle to recapture the past, but not this one. I could not help but think that this writer is a master. I could go on and on, raving about her writing, but I want to talk about books themselves that bring you in touch with a writer who is so good at what she does, you are transported to a world she has recreated for your enlightenment. How else could this happen if man had not created books?
They are like airplanes that take you to far away places when your own world is closing in on you. Foreman took me back to the seventeenth century to party among the Lords and Ladies of England, and I must say I was quite shocked at what terrible gamblers many of them were. Georgianna herself developed such a gambling problem that it affected her marriage to a rich noble who also became an inveterate gambler. After a lot of fear she told her husband once about her gambling debts and he gave her a line of credit to pay some of them off, and she took that out and gambled it away! She got so bad, nothing stopped her. She eventually begged and borrowed money from her friends, tapped money lenders, and was pilloried in the press for not paying her gambling debts. This amounted to me to quite a serious mental illness.
There are some wonderful photos of the huge houses her husband's family owned, both in the city and the countryside. Georgianna was involved in politics as hardly any other woman before her had been. In fact it would be another hundred years before a woman was able to come out in public, campaign and do the things she did so easily that her society was not able to stop her from doing at first. She was a very popular duchess for a long time. Cartoons are included of her being mercilessly lampooned in the press for her towering hats, emphasis on fashion, and a number of other traits. The cartoonists treated her just like they did the men. If she was going to expose herself in public they were going to make fun of her.
Gainsborough painted a portrait of her that is famous to this day with a dashing big hat decorated with an ostrich feather and perched jauntily on the side of her head. She showed such a flair for politics helping put and keep her party, the Whigs, in power for some time, that I thought what a shame it was she developed such a gambling habit. Her marriage seems a lot to blame which was a cold arrangement from the start with her parents, a Lord and Lady, too, picking her husband for his wealth more than she was allowed to pick one she was compatible with. She was only seventeen when she married him and he went right on with his mistress hardly hiding her at all. That would be quite enough to disallusion any young girl about her husband, wealthy or not. It is doubtful if they were ever in love with one another.
Then the horrors of childbirth in those days with her expected to produce a male heir which seemed to lead to repeated miscarriages out of sheer nervousness that she would not measure up and produce a son. In fact, she was only able to produce 2 daughters in the marriage, and that took years. She was finally put aside for inability to have the heir everyone wanted as well as for her gambling habits and eventually her own infidelity, even though her husband had not been faithful from the start!
Georgianna was a many times great aunt of Princess Diana and she was loved by the public for her beauty, charm, intelligence, and fashion just as Diana was. She was even tall like Dianna. I am enjoying this book so much and it is reminding me once again of why I aspired to be a writer, to give back if I possibly could the gift that has been given me by so many writers. I wanted to write about my world in such a way that people could enjoy it as well as receive some enlightenment from it.
So many times I have been saved from absolute doldrums by picking up a book. Disability and lack of money made my world smaller, but books have always been my tickets to travel, the past, distant lands, just wherever a writer took me inside magical pages of print.
Which is why I blog, too, because a blog is like a continued story that purports to entertain others with an account of how I live my life. I appreciate those writers who continue to share their lives with me. There is no greater gift as far as I am concerned.

Saturday, May 30, 2009

Doc has DTs so has been forced off the sauce for a few days

He was drinking so heavily I had to stop my play series and rant as I fear the worst. He will probably still lay off only until he feels a little better then will succumb to the craving again. I just uploaded another portion of an hours long rant which he took surprisingly well, even seemed to want because he knew he was headed into trouble.
Another kind of trouble has hit my relatives in Boulder. A doctor who inherited a vacation home there from his mother has been flying into Boulder for years, landing at the little air strip on Home Bench, a couple of miles out. Nearly forty years ago when our family dog, a white samoyed mix, got shot in a farmer's sheep pature, and one leg was hanging, I asked this young doctor if he would cut it the rest of the way off and sew it up. Frosty had been shot 3 times, but he agreed to do what I asked and this dog lived, becoming a three legged dog instead. It was sad but it kept him from chasing sheep.
Well, this kindly young doctor, now in his 60's, flew his plane low into a canyon up there, clipped a power line and crashed, killing him and a woman passenger on board. The woman was not his wife since she according to the paper refused to fly with him anymore because he did 'crazy' things while flying. Turns out she was smart. What makes pilots of small planes take unecessary chances and kill themselves? Boredom? Hunting for thrills? Could substance abuse have been a factor? I do know his death has upset a lot of people who looked up to him and admired him for his intelligence and accomplishments.
P.S. A friend who knew him better than I did said how kind he was when she had an accident on her son's motorcycle and scraped her face and thought she would be scarred for life. His remodeled home in Boulder is stunnngly beautiful. She said she met his wife a couple of years ago and she was very beautiful. Now she wonders if anyone will occupy that beautiful home in the place not far from where he crashed?

Friday, May 29, 2009

Having lunch at Thai Elephant with daughter Ronda

Our meals were so delicious. I had tofu with bamboo shoots, bean sprouts, broccoli, cabbage, onion, carrot, green beans, and brown rice. She had shrimp and she loved her vegetables, too. She was coming from her first job as a nurse at Good Sam's not far away. Of course, we talked about nursing as I am always eager to hear how she is doing, how she likes it and so on She is thinking now of becoming a teacher of nurses eventually because she does not like nurse hours, which usually include weekends. She has had a west coast swing dance club hobby for years and can't go when she has to work. Nor can she go out with her husband as she is accustomed to doing.
Her husband is doing very well as he is slated to take over the general manager job in his company with 250 employees under him in just a month or two. What a conscientious guy he is! Whenever you go to their house he is right there helping Ronda every minute. He will wash the dishes. He is not above any task. And in the 12 years they have been together. I have never seen him get angry! But he is so energetic and task oriented I can see how he could inspire employees!
We had a very nice time and I bought some of my generous porportion home for supper. I am glad I got to take Ronda to my favorite restaurant. Chad, her husband in photo below.

Oh, folks, my sister Linda still struggling with her numb hands has posted another entry in her blog Vooman's Voice. (check it out on my blog list) I am so glad to see her writing, rising above her worries about her ailments. My sister Ann, the perpetually baby sitting grandma, said that she thinks she is going to have time to start a blog. With so many who migrated from AOL not posting very often, we need all the new bloggers we can get! My son Dan said he was even thinking of starting a blog. I said oh what will the name of it be so I can check it out. He said "It Sucks." I said oh. I did check out a sucks blog but it wasn't his, so I will have to tell him that lovely name might be taken. He is also helping son Dante to start a blog so he can communicate to his friends while he is in California for the summer. I think the sooner Dante gets started the better blogger he will become. That is probably why he wanted to make a video so he can embed it in his blog!
Our family has had a family website for years. I don't know what we would do without a place to read all the family news and see recent photos. Now some of the frequent writers and contributers are branching out to blogs.
Linda is an entertaining poet. I hope she will soon post some of her latest. Ann is always working on a book. And she has written some good poetry, too, mainly a book about growing up on a ranch and cow punching with my dad. Ann became his main go to daughter, after I left home. My sister LaRae rebelled and went off to work in a jam factory one summer to get away. I remember her declaring she would never milk cows again, while I quite liked milking and so did Ann. We had a loving relationship with milk cows. Ha.

Here is Linda in a meeting with a SF poet. She has already been to a poetry reading. I think SF will inspire her to write poetry as they have a very big society of poets there. They even have poet laureates of the city. I hope Linda will tell us more about her poet friends.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Gerry rants about the drunk abuser

The alcoholic as abuser

I am reading "Alaska" by James Michener written in 1988 and what has shocked me is how big of destructive role alcohol has played in Alaska's history and is no doubt still affecting its native people, especially, just as it does our native-American population in the southwest.
Unscrupulous American ship captains and traders introduced barrels of rum to the natives with a disastrous effect. I just read about two villages in particular that depended on the sea for food, but when the men should have been going out to sea to bring in the sea animal food supply needed for winter, two villages, men and women, too, stayed drunk until they were wiped out with hunger, and starved to death. When people went back to these villages they found them all dead.
Missionaries and some ship captains who were more scrupulous attempted to run these sea captains out of the territory. Of course when the natives were tempted with barrels of rum they would give up their valuable fur collection to them, with nobody benefiting but the trader. Alcohol was a problem when the Russians controlled Alaska, but after they sold it to the Americans, their ship traders came north and wrecked even more havoc on the natives than the Russians had done. I about quit reading this novel when I got to this part, I was so disheartened.
I saw a documentary on doctors not long ago and this one doctor who worked in emergency all the time said that the biggest problem there is in medicine, the one that causes the most damage to the most people is alcohol. I believe it.
Doc pushed me into making another DVD yesterday which ended up being a rant on alcoholic abuse. I was surprised at how much anger I still retain over a childhood filled with worry and strain because of my dad's drinking, and the cousins, children of his brothers, had to suffer the same upsets.
Every once in a while I tackle the problem of alcohol because it takes such a huge toll, is always with us, always doing more damage, taking more lives, crippling others. It is a subject that haunts me, you might say.
I try to interact with alcoholics because I am familiar with the problem and what it does to people. Doc was perfectly willing to play the self destructive drunk in this home made movie about the toll of alcohol on my life and on his. I said I wish I could put this in all the theaters. I am sure many people whose lives have been devastated by alcoholic abusers would like to put their stories out there. Countless women have been killed by mates who were abusing alcohol. Countless automobile accident victims have been literally crippled for life by alcoholics. To say nothing of all thoses who have been killed outright.
I used to feel growing up that people did not tackle it enough, but if they didn't they were in danger of being one of the 'innocent' victims of drunk strangers who careened into their lives with the impact of a bullet or a bomb.
Children born into the homes of alcoholics cannot escape, so I think the least adults can do is tackle the horrors of living with alcohol once in a while in an honest attempt to do something about the problem, rather than just ignore it.
If you drive on the highways there is no place to hide that you will not encounter it, that you will not risk being forever impacted by it. A drunk man goes down a freeway road the wrong way and causes a giant crash. That's a possibility we are up against on our highways constantly.
My dad never hesitated to drive blind drunk down a highway, and at one point in his life he hit a car head on on the wrong side of the road. Only by the grace of god did those people in that car escape with their lives. Both cars were totaled.
So I am sorry to give you this bad medicine today, the subject of alcohol and the toll it takes on people's lives. But if we grapple with it together, sharing ideas, we just might come up with something that will affect somebody.
Doc asked for this rant so I gave it to him. He is the best judge of what might help him. If you have spent years of 'social drinking' what is it going to take to affect you? Just remember you as an adult without the problem might get tired of talking about drunks, but a child cannot get 'tired' of a father who drinks. That's the hell of it. You are sick to death of it, and he is still going to come home drunk and upset the household. I used to pray for him to go to sleep, but I knew from experience he was going to have to rant and try to continue the 'party' with my protesting mother. She just as well not have been so impatient, because here was her chance to tell him what she thought, if she did not lose her temper too badly, which she often did and then the fights would start. To her mind, it did no good whatsoever to 'talk' to a drunk because he was drunk.
Well, he was still trying to function as a human being, and when he sobered up she sure couldn't talk to him. He would be short tempered and defensive and would be rushing off to catch up the work he had neglected while on his binge. So I talk to Doc while he is drinking, because he is always drinking, but I try to do it before noon, even though everyone is always expressing impatience at my still trying to affect this drunk.
I say it is a privilege not to have to interact with a drunk. My kids have got very little patience when it comes to interacting with Doc. They feel they will be indulging him by even exchanging a few words with him. I say bah! Try having a father as a drunk. I wanted my kids to be spared that as much as possible, but now they are a little too determined never to rub shoulders at all with these problem alcoholics of the world.
What better thing have I got to do, stay in my apartment and watch TV? No, I have to do what I can to affect the drunks of the world, too. I know Doc will not sober up with no intervention. To me this is called intervention. I find that my kids don't know what to do with ME, so they are not prone to spend a lot of time interacting with me either. And I am not a drunk. You see, sometimes if you try to save yourself from all these unpleasant experiences perhaps you will lose the ability or not develop it to interact with anybody, drunk or sober.
My dad was a hard working man when sober who accomplished a prodiguous amount of work, so when he was drunk, I found out he could still work hard analyzing and arguing and so on. Later on, I felt we daughters were keeping him sober only by interacting with him. Some of these big arguments we had were unpleasant, but they were a lot better than coping with him drunk. My mother was not nearly as hard a worker when it came to analyzing problems as he was. He could have taught her what keeping on the job could do had she been able to think of him as still a man inside the slcoholic who could teach her a thing or two, even if drunk! It's a complicated thing trying to intervene. That's what I am talking about.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Dante's summer plans

Dante said Grandma I want to come over to your house and make a video. He said he wanted to do a monologue but had to think about it. After two hours he decided he could not be ready with a monologue this time so he told me to interview him. I always interrogate him when he comes to visit me to find out about his life, so he is used to that format! Doc said his grandma did not do that. I thought all grandmas interrogated their grandsons and tried to get us much infor out of them as possible in the interests of heading off trouble.
By the way Dante is the same age his dad was in the Prince of Saturn. Dan is Johnny, of course. Now he has a son the same age he was at that rather stressful time in our lives. I am happy that Dante has a dad while Dan's Dad he has only seen about twice. He never interacted with him. I would call him and Dante friends, so that is a plus for both of them!

Monday, May 25, 2009

Grandson Dante, his dad Dan, and I go to the movies and lunch

Dante will be going to California at the end of the school year to stay with his Aunt Stephanie as his mother struggles with the bad economy. Dan's employer told him that work would be very slow if not non existent from about the middle of July into September, then business is expected to pick back up. There are a lot of jobs in Arizona centered around the season of good weather which draws many visitors, conventions, etc, to Arizona. So I invited them over before he leaves. He said he might come next weekend, too.
We went to see Night in the Museum subtitled Battle in the Smithsonian, which is about what we expected, lots of startling special effects and a somewhat lightweight story. But we knew what to expect so we were satisfied. Dan and Dante went to see the new Terminator movie out the week before.
Dante wanted to come over and make a video as we had not made one for a long time. So we did. I think he was mostly wanting to register his different look. He does not look like a child anymore, and his hair has turned curly. And gotten darker. I thought the above was a great photo of him and his dad together I took at Subway, as well as the one I took of him. I decided not to post the one of him and me together, as my wrinkles are really showing closeup.
Tomorrow I will upload his video called Dante's Summer Plans. I never miss a chance to do a video of him, especially if he asks if we can make one. Then he's happy and I am happy. I don't worry about the content so much, but am just letting him get used to the camera. He still turns shy when the camera is on him, but he is getting more comfortable all the time. There is a lot to getting used to in being the subject of a video. Doc couldn't see what this video was about, but Dante looked startling on Doc's big screen TV. I am for letting him grow into the idea of what he can do.
At first he wanted to make it alone, but the more he thought about it, the more he felt he was not ready to make something up on his own, so he asked me to interrogate him again as I always do when he comes to visit. I ask him about his life. Some stuff I asked him about today was rather sad and I could not put it in the video. Dante has always dealt with tough stuff in his family. He is a child raised in considerable crisis, but I think he's doing pretty darn well.

Johnny questions his mother's ideals because they lead to poverty (Prince from S, Act I, Scene 8)

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Further interpretation of my dream about the visit from spirits

I always go back after I have had a vivid dream I think might be a warning of a future event pending and analyze the dream again. Since the dream at first seemed to indicate that my life might be drawing to an end, I analyzed my own state of health and just could not see how I could die as soon as this dream indicated. In fact, I have been feeling better once the deaths let up around here and the attempt by this one man to end his life stopped. I now feel too healthy to die very soon!
So I went back to the dream again to see if someone else close to me could be in danger of dying and came up with Doc. The Marlon Brando character could also be Doc who might be a prominent actor is my mind, more influential in my life than either Marlon Brando or James Dean. Also Doc is thin. He has never been more than 10 pounds overweight. Marlon Brando was significantly thinner in this dream than he was in the latter part of his life and when he died.
Most significantly, my dad arrived in the dream, and I thought that the shirt he was wearing was very vivid. I kept touching it, astounded that I could both see and touch him and his clothes so clearly. So who has been playing my dad in several of my plays, or one similar to him, but Doc? He has in fact helped me to resolve quite a lot of issues I had with my dad by portraying our conflicts. If my dad comes in a gentler way, some of this is thanks to Doc. I had also bought Doc many 'costume' cowboy shirts to wear in these scenes.
Also my dad had his mind on 'gifts.' Doc refers again and again the gifts from him I will inherit upn his death, the computer, the camera, and now the HD-TV. Now I am wondering if Doc will survive his first life threatening alcoholic crisis.
His death would be hard on me, almost life threatening to get through.
I will now have to see if this interpretation is more accurate. I find that these dreams help me to get through a crisis, and messages are picked up for that purpose. So I will be watchful now waiting to see what transpires. I will probably mention this interpretation to Doc eventually but he is beyond being scared about what he is doing to himself. He might get annoyed, but I don't think he will pay much heed.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Howler, Ken's werewolf self, arrives and Johnny tries to get rid of him (P from S play, Act I, Scene 7)

Visits from Marlon Brando and Father signal the end is near perhaps?

I had the most vivid dream about my dad. I dreamed he knocked on the door and when I opened it I could not get over the fact that he appeared as his normal self in every way. I touched his shirt and said, "I can't get over how well I am seeing you!" And all the time I was thinking fast, what does this mean? He said something about some gifts he was getting us for Xmas. I thought I said oh, anything is all right.
What is more just before that dream I had a long involved one where Marlon Brando turned up I think in someone else's apartment, but I was there talking to him, trying to make an impression on him in regard to my plays. He was not overweight, more like his old self but I thought he had been hit by a car. Since James Dean was killed in a car wreck and became a good spirit friend of mine, this could have been him as well as Brando.

Brando who had such a sexy body I thought felt inclined to hide himself in weight as I started doing while very young, eating comfort food. I was extremely traumatized by adults chasing me around as a child as though I attracted them sexually.
So I rushed down to Doc's this morning to upload another video since I don't know how long I have got left on the earth and need to get everything done. Then I went to the Farmer's Market but not before having Doc take a photo of me in my new white hat and black and white skirt. I have so much white now I needed a new hat, but could not find one for a cheap price in the thrift store. I bought this one which is cloth in a hat store paying $30 for it, but it is very light and will be well worth it as I need to get as much use out of this outfit as I can before I go, so buying it won't have been a waste.
Once more, I felt I needed to dress up my body rather than to feed it. I try to motivate myself to stay thin which may give me a few more days or weeks of life. I also got a $10 haircut from someone in the building for summer. I told her not to cut it too short, but she still did, but it will grow. So now I am ready ready for summer.
I told Doc this morning that since he won't quit drinking, I will probably have to leave the earth just to get away from him. I like him in the morning but have to spend lonely afternoons and evenings when he is lost to me in his drinking. He is only a part time companion.
I feel it would be about impossible for me to find a better one since he is the most entertaining male companion I have ever found, the most in tune with my interests. He enjoys all the acting we do, but just not enough to sober up completely for it.
My disability which causes extreme weakness at times is dangerous when you are old. You do not think it would take much to carry you off, but I am ready, have been getting ready for some time. I just have to tie up all the loose ends.
My disability has kept me from participating in life as fully as I should have been able to do had I remained well, but I was willing to take whatever life I could have, which all disabled people must decide to do. You adjust to your limitations and eventually the rest of the world starts to catch up with you as they develop their own health problems, and pretty soon you are pretty much on a level playing field. But Daddy called almost as though to tap me on the shoulder and say, "Not long now." So I must take heed. Let's see, how do I prepare some more and pack for this journey. Any ideas?

Friday, May 22, 2009

People, horses, dogs, and green green grass of home

I had not had a chance to comment on the Preakness when a filly, "Rachel Alexander" won, the first time in 80 years a filly has triumphed there. Aside from Mine that Bird who proved himself to be a very exciting racehorse who came from behind and almost caught up with her. They will both be running in the Belmont Stakes so that should be one spectacular race, coming up this Saturday.
I talked to Raymond as he was traveling to get lumber and supplies for his set and a fence for his new dog, "Baby." I was glad to see a new entry on his blog "Cowboys and Bohemians" (also on my blog list) after resting up in Boulder (pictured above) after his Los Angeles venture.
My sister Linda has been getting instructions on how to create a blog which is listed now on my blog list, "Vooman's Voice." She is planning to post some of her poetry, political cartoons, drawings, and opinions. But today is the day she finally is getting her long awaited MRI to see if it will show what is going on with her numb hands. She mentioned she hoped California where she is (SF) didn't go entirely broke before she got treated.
I am continuing to post the reading of my play, Prince from Saturn. I am so glad to get this play up on Youtube, written in 1986-90. Doc has been very restless since he was not featured in this series, but he and I watched some of our older DVDs, one he calls 4 X rated where we talk about subjects we don't think we can put up on Youtube. He now thinks these are some of the best we have done, so we always have subjects we can discuss and film. I was thinking about those as I have been reading the bloggers' comments on the fact that the blogger community that migrated from AOL journals is not nearly so active, but I think it is coming along as well as can be expected after that upheavel. Besides people have to get their second wind when it comes to blogging. At first in J-land, there was a great burst of enthusiasm as people took to blogging for the first time. Having written all my life, I am not surprised that adjustments had to be made down the road aways.
Writing has to become a part of one's inner life in order to retain enthusiasm. Adjustments have to be made for health concerns. I started keeping journals when I was in my teens so journaling on AOL seemed like a natural fit, and I have migrated to blogspot with little adjustment problems, but as with plays, there is always the struggle to find readers. In order to do that, reading other blogs is imperative I believe. The best way to make a writer out of yourself is to help others find joy and appreciation in writing too!
I have tried to help my sisters to become writers as well as my kids. To me, this is what education is all about, helping everyone learn to read and write and enjoy it. Writing a poem or a song is a joy people should not miss if they can help it. They may have a short story, a play, or even a novel in them. And everybody has a memoir to write. So there are a lot of writing challenges for those who want to continue to develop themselves.
I can picture the beautiful town of Boulder above becoming a mecca for art, summer theater, music festivals, etc, just as breathtakingly gorgeous Sedona has become in Arizona. My niece Charyl and Raymond are now offering creative workshops in connection to the festival (Boulder Heritage Festival listed on my blog list)in playwriting, acting, poetry writing. Cheryl's husband Steve is teaching birdwatching. Raymond is singing for his supper at the Hell's Backbone Grill. I am so looking forward to seeing one of my country plays, Happy Hello, Sad Goodbye, done in this setting, where it was written.
So put Boulder, Utah (pictured above) on your map as a place to visit one of these years in the summertime!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Sometimes angels can intervene through caring people to save a life

May a heavenly angel watch over you
I talked to the man who finally sobered up I thought in just the nick of time. I thought he was only days maybe even hours from his death. He confirmed that things had become desperate.
A good woman friend here took him to every hospital in the vicinity and every emergency ward turned him away. He had been in some of the hospitals but would go home and drink again. They finally gave up. He said he went over to Circle K to get some more beer and was sitting outside somewhere drinking. A young woman whose face he can only vaguely remember came up and started talking to him. When he told her about the hours they had spent trying to find a place that would take him, she said that she was going to try to help him. She took his apartment number.
He went home and he said a couple of hours later she knocked on his door, and said that she was there to take him to a hospital. When they arrived at Good Sam's, he said oh no, I have already been here, they won't take me. She said, we are going to bypass emergency. They have a bed waiting for you in ICU and you will be under the care of such and such a doctor. I must say this young woman had unusual authority. He said it was discovered in the ICU that blood poisoning was already taking place from the long infected scrapes and cuts on his body. They put an IV of antibiotics directly into his veins and kept it there until he left. The doctor also said he wanted to try a new drug that has been successful in treating alcoholics.
The man said that another doctor had ordered this drug and his insurance (medicare) would not pay for it. The doctor told him if they turned him down he had the power to over ride the refusal and give it to him anyway, which he did.
From that point on he slowly worked his way back to sobriety. I said, who was that woman? He said she was an angel. Tears came to my eyes. I said she certainly was your angel. I believe that if this young woman had not come along and this doctor had not believed he was worth helping, this man would not be with us today.
I said your recovery will give all alcoholics hope and an example, even the most stubborn of them. This man has aged from this awful experience, but he is looking better every day, more calm, more like the man whose sobriety we had enjoyed for five years.
I told him that I know we all have to die, but not like that, drunk, dirty and out of his mind, when he can be so lucid. I said what made you snap. He said, I don't know, prosperity. I can't stand things to go too well.

Ken is granted SSI and they return to Jana's house to wait for big back payment and Johnny calls the baby names (Act I, Scene 6)

Johnny's patience snaps when he comes home to find Ken and Casey back to wait for their big check after Ken is finally granted SSI. He calls Baby Maureen 'a little nerd' and Ken snaps and Jana snaps and Johnny leaves home never to return again he says. Ken learns how to joke so Johnny will come back.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Grandson Jamal graduates from high school

This young man has I don't think scarcely given anyone trouble his whole life. He was the quietest child. You could not ignore his quietness. You noticed it. In our loud mouth family it made him stand out.
I was surprised because he expressed such an interest in learning how to read. He could read before he ever went to kindergarten. That was fun. He was always looking for words, wherever we went, on billboards, on the sides of trucks, he would say, "Grandma, look, frito-lay-chips!" And of course on TV. It is funny how someone focuses on something if they aspire to master a skill. He and I were close as can be after his mom went back to finish college, and I looked after him during the day. Until she met and married the man who became a caring step dad to him. The only trouble he gave me was wanting to play games too long!
He has turned out to be the most gifted in math, but he stayed in the gifted classes all his school years.
He will be going to ASU this fall to major in business with a scholarship that will pay for his tuition as long as he keeps his grades up. He earned this Presidential scholarship with his good grades in high school.
Here he is when he was just starting out with his Uncle Dan.

He and I are taking a nap together. I think we look alike somehow here.

He is lifting his little brother, Ethan, here.

And of course his hair always looked different, dependng on the length, but everyone was fascinated with his hair. When he had some big hair about the same height as in this picture, his little cousin Dante who just started to walk came up behind him, look speculatively at that hair, and suddenly reached out and grabbed it with his little hands and pummeled it as fast as he could. It was so funny, but Jamal yelled, and Dante was dragged away. He tried a 'fro in high school, and then suddenly had it trimmed one day, and I dont know if we will ever see big hair on him again. Here he is with some big hair due mostly to his mom being too busy to cut it.

One of my favorite photos of him that I took at the civic center when his mom was graduating as a nurse last year.

Monday, May 18, 2009

"War Mother" sculpture by Charles Umlauf in June Issue of Sun featuring an interview with John Dear about non violence and what Christ would do

Also contained in this issue was a letter I wrote to the editor way back protesting an interview with Paul Krassner who I thought did not acknowledge the violence of the abortion solution. I wrote that I hoped the Sun would print interviews with the non violent to balance out his view, and lo and behold the interview by John Malkin of John Dear on nonviolence, civil disobedience, and doing time could not have been stronger. I feel now the editors saved my letter to print in this issue.
John Dear is a Christian activist who was inspired by the Berrigan Priest, Daniel Berrigan, who had also greatly inspired me at the time he was so active. John Dear protests nuclear weapons and war in many ways, through lectures, his books, and protests that have landed him in jail.
He said Berrigan pointed out to him that Christ was the great protester who died for his beliefs because governments always believe in war. He always preached non violence and forgiveness.
I was very impressed with his explanation of his Christian activism. He also said that he believed in vegetarianism because the world's hunger for meat is destroying our environment. That is also very troubling to me. He said people are starving because of this unnatural appetite for meat, and how much grain, water, etc, it takes to satisfy the world's appetite, while many who can't afford it starve. He said vegetarianism is a less expensive diet which I have found out and healthier for us.
I felt as though I had been uplifted and nurtured upon reading John Dear's words, his ideas on how to put belief into action that stirs change in the hearts of men.
My sister Margie gave me this subscription of Sun Magazine for Christmas. My niece Cheryl gave it to me for three or four years some time ago.

Popular high school daughter and boyfriend and their Harlequin romance

Best potato salad ever!

I make this salad only about once a year because I am apt to founder on it, but when Doc brought me 5 ears of corn that were really good, I asked him to get a few more, because I had just been given the right amount of small red potatoes to make this salad. I purchased the green beans at the farmer's market as well as the wonderful olive oil. Well, let me give you the ingredients and instructions!

6 ears of corn boiled for 3 minutes and put into ice water
Couple of handfuls of green beans boiled about 3 minutes (until tender) and put into ice water
4 pounds of small red potatoes boiled around 20 minutes and cooled down
In the meantime roast 3-4 poblema (sp) green peppers (I bought mine fresh to Farmer's Market) in a hot fying pan. When browned on all sides and appearing done put into plastic bags and close up so steam can loosen the skin more
1/3 cup of chopped chives (important for taste)

As for the vinegrette dressing, put 4 tablespoons full of wine vinegar in a big bowl with salt and pepper, mix in a tablespoon and a half of dijon mustard. Then slowly drizzle 1/2 cup of olive oil in and mix.

Mix in potatoes first, cut to size you want after boiling, then add green beans. Cut corn off the cob and mix. Clean seeds out of peppers and peal off skin. Chop and mix in followed by the chopped chives.

If you love corn on the cob and potato salad this combination will give you such good eating, well, I could not stop sampling this divine dish all day. (That's why I don't make it too often)

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Son Dan takes Doc to get HD-TV, Farmers Market, and video "Ken has had 36 Moms trying to help him" (play reading, Act I, Scene 4)

Doc is elated about his new high definition TV, displayed in photo. My son Dan took us to Walmart, and the new TV took up so much room in his car, he had to take Doc and it back to his apartment and return to get me and groceries. Doc paid Dan, so he was happy, as his hours have been drastically cut on his job due to the economy meltdown.
I went to the Farmer's Market this morning which was very busy due to many in the complex getting some coupons this week for produce. Besides some great looking vegetables and fruit, I got some oatmeal, wheatberry bread, and eggplant tamales. I love going to the Farmers Market on Saturday. Oh yes, and I bought this tye dye summer dress in photo which goes with my tye dye hat I bought last year. Tyde dye girl said this dress was her grand experiment. I just love it!

Ken loses his jobs almost as fast as he gets them, so even 36 moms do not keep him from living on the edge of starvation and the street. Jana tries to come up with solutions but Ken is too afraid of mean men to work for hardly anybody.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Writing to Oprah for a spot on her show and video "Jana gets her welfare benefits cancelled" and she and her daughter Raya are not too happy

After I read that Oprah went to Scotland to Susan Boyle's home town to interview her, I decided that I should contact her, since Susan Boyle's fame was helped along by Youtube videos of her singing. It might be hard to discover a playwright on Youtube, but now with 5 of my plays there, it should be easier. My last video got a 5 star rating and went to 114 hits very fast. Granted that is not two or three hundred thousand plus a boost or two from some famous people, but it is a start. Besides I have too many videos up there now it would be hard to get the required amount on just one.
I decided Oprah and I are a good fit, since I have issues which also interest her (child molestation, domestic violence, gay fathers, poverty, prejudice, disability). She has also probably done more to promote book reading with her book club than any other talk show host I can think of. If I see a book in the thrift store with Oprah's name on it, I buy it if I have not read it. I know I will like it and respect her choice at the same time. I have been reviewing books in my blog, one reason I started it, as I love to promote books.
Plus I am ready for fame, since if I wait much longer it might be too late for me to enjoy it. I would like to get a taste of it while I can still walk!
I went to Oprah's website where they have forms to fill out with suggestions for a show. I did that and submitted it.
Course I am not going to sit around and wait for her to call me. I will just keep on writing and filming. I uploaded video number 4 of the Prince from Saturn series and I will embed it here in this entry. It is called "Jana's welfare is cut off and she has a meltdown".

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Historical novel, "Through A Glass Darkly" by Karleen Koen keeps me enthralled

Even though it is a hefty 673 pages, I could not stop reading this novel published in 1986 until I was done, that is given time for eating and sleeping and a few other necessary activities. My eyes are tired! But sometimes a novel like this one, set in the 17th century among the aristocracy in England, will cover difficult issues better than a modern one where fear of being politically incorrect muzzles a writer. In this one a young heiress, granddaughter of a duchess, comes of age, and her mother tries to find a wealthy suitor to 'buy' her for what he can offer the family. Her mother first settles on an older man in his early forties who wants to develop a valuable property that comes with the fifteen year old bride to be.
The prospective bride is lucky in that the man is very handsome and she falls in love with the idea of marrying him. Then her mother gets what she thinks is a better offer and drops the negotiations leaving her daughter bereft. The daughter turns to her grandmother, the duchess, who knows the handsome suitor who was an aide to her husband when he was a commander in the military. Her husband thought highly of him, so she agrees to help the daughter get the man who she now loves desperately. She goes by the greedy mother who is thinking only of what she can get out of the marriage, and negotiates with the man himself. But she is a little troubled as she has heard stories about the bad reputation of this man who has never married and is concerned about whether her grand daughter will really be happy.
It seems that he is afflicted with what is called the French vice or the Italian one according to gossip and loves men as well as women. May even have loved her husband the duke, but the duchess suppresses that thought as she was very happy with her husband.
Well, of course, the rumours happen to be true, and the beautiful fifteen year old has a very tough job trying to deal with not only the women he has loved but the men as one comes back into his life after the marriage, a French prince, she immediately senses as a rival, but it takes most of the book for her to face what their close relationship is really all about.
Oh how easy it is to lose your heart to a very handsome man who has undoubtedly been targeted by gays since he was very young, who love charming handsome young lovers just like women do. Karleen Koen is a shrewd brave writer, too, she does not shrink from the truth. I thought she wrote about these complex matters extremely well.
What is more all of Europe had an economic meltdown after the marriage, and even noblemen went from riches to rags. The bride's own older brother commits suicide after a string of bad investments. Her mother has to pawn her jewels even more frantically than in good times. The magnificent house her handsome husband is building on the land she brought to him becomes his downfall and is eventually lost to creditors. De ja vu!
Small pox and pneumonia and consumption strike terror in the hearts of those who lived in those times. Even without the black plague there are horrors enough in this novel.
But stories like this are why I read. I got hooked a long time ago on a good novel. A good writer weaves her spell and I can barely lay a book down until I am done.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Broken down TVs caused my son Johnny grief who hated being on welfare (P from Saturn, Act I, Scene 1c)

Dinner at Thai Elephant with Gary

Gary and I had a lovely visit and good food at the Thai Elephant downtown for my Mother's Day outing. He and his ex are trying to sell the house they bought together. He said the realtor has filled it with beautiful furniture. I hope it sells, even though this is not the best time in Arizona to market a house. Gary is anxious to get out of it into a cheaper house, suited for a single man.
My sister Linda called me from San Francisco last night trying to get her blog up and going. I could not find it this morning by name so she must still be having trouble. I will put it on my blog list as soon as she figures out how to do it. I told her I would envy her her apartment on the beach this summer when the heat hits here. She is practically allergic to the heat, so I know she will be better off there. Next week is her long awaited for appointment for an MRI to see if they can get to the bottom of her numb hands symptom.
Have been concerned about Mary Jo who is experiencing severe chronic fatigue symtoms even though she is planning happy events every day. Check out her blog Following the Pi'ed Piper on my blog list which is her blog under another name. I also felt some alarm over Lisa's last blog entry in Please Dont Take Life for Granted. Some pretty bad symptoms, and her comment section has disappeared. Maybe that is what she wanted, I don't know because she is far too ill to be suffering from any adverse remarks. Her blog is on my blog list, too. Some folks are cruel no matter what is going on in the other person's life.
Now I have got to figure out what I am up to despite my chronic fatigue symptoms! But am feeling a little better since the man in here trying to kill himself via alcohol sobered up. He is still not out of the woods, but I immediately stopped having the worst symptoms when he was able to get hold of sobriety again somehow. He said though, he is having some very rough days. I don't doubt it. I just hope he can hang on. He has no choice but to sober up, or die I think, and we have had enough deaths in here for a while.
Drinkers do not realize it, like Doc, but the minute someone is sober they begin to think on more levels than an alcoholic does. Their brain starts to function in subtle ways that aren't recognizable unless they are lost due to being drunk. Drinkers soon descend to a primitive level of reaction which explains why they have such a tough time interacting with people. Doc holes up and watches TV all the time and talks about what the TV people are doing. They don't talk back!
Don't you love the snag above by Connie? It cheered me up just to look at it!

Monday, May 11, 2009

I woke up at 5 am this morning!

I could not sleep a moment longer, that's because I napped too long yesterday afternoon. You can only sleep so much in a day and at 5 am I had had all the sleep I could sleep. So I am up ready to go.
I am thinking about my play, Prince from Saturn. More than 15 years ago I had revised it after the production and sent it to the Arizona State Theater Company. Someone whipped it back to me so fast my head spun. That kind of discouraged me. This was a play about being Arizona poor. A play about the disabled and poor class I somehow did not think would appeal to any out of state theater companies either, but if theater companies are not interested in what happens to a playwright whose health gets impaired as well as a learning disabled schizophrenic what are they interested in?
That was a puzzle to me. I now have five of my full length plays up on Youtube that I was never able to get produced by a theater company. Only one, my son's Playwright Workshop Theater Company, ever produced my plays, two of them, Prince from Saturn and Happy Hello, Sad Goodbye. I have written other plays as well.
The conclusion I draw from this is that theater companies who will want to do your plays do not exist. Theater companies exist all right, but they have playwright friends whose plays they want to produce, not yours. They don't even know you. Their artistic directors have come up through the ranks of becoming a director of a big theater company. The Arizona State Theater Company is regional. Their productions are staged in both Tucson and Phoenix. Those in charge of hiring naturally wanted a good experienced artistic director with great credentials. He weasn't going to be from here. He might even have a national reputation. It might take him years to acclimate to Arizona if he wasn't from here.
To such a director I might seem like a total foreigner. I think the guy who was in charge of reading plays when I sent the company the Prince from Saturn had graduated from Yale in theater. He was looking for a director's job at a theater company and soon got one when another director here retired. Those in charge of hiring naturally wanted a director with great credentials, too. But such out of state directors tend to do plays written by playwrights they know from somewhere else. And when in doubt, a classic, a Pulitzer prize winning play, or one that has won a Tony, Broadway's highest honor, will pass muster with theater audiences.
I would venture to say it would probably take years to understand all the variables in my particular play writing, coming from Utah as I did, traveling back and forth to Los Angeles for a while, and finally settling in Phoenix going on 30 or so years. Plus I am a woman, and let us face it, there are fewer women playwrights.
So I am probably right where it was possible for me to be, after years of trying, up on Youtube but certainly not a household name in theater.
But I am still very excited about the possibilities. In this last reading I don't contend with Doc's alcoholism. I just go with my own talent, but after working with him for nearly 4 years, he was finally able to support my talent and stay out of this one because he thought it was better for the play. His alcoholism is intrusive sometimes and disturbing. But it took this long for him to fade into the back ground long enough to support me reading this play. Support. You have to have support to do anything in theater. It is very important.
I could not have read this play on camera by myself without support. In the first place I would not even have the camera. He bought the camera. He burned about fifteen copies of this reading, saying it was my best work, and that if anything could this reading would bring me success. Well, it added onto all the others we have done.
I certainly did not want an alcoholic as a partner. I would have preferred sober, but he was the only partner I could get. So you don't turn down a gift from the gods is my contention. I could work on his alcoholism as we worked on the plays. In fact, the plays were his therapy, but he is a very stubborn case. Very trying at times I must say.
I trust that I and the theater company directors will meet some time, if not here, in the sweet bye and bye. We are bound to meet. We are in the same business. But we can't work together unles we are comfortable with each other. That takes time, a lot of time.
In the meantime you do what you can to prepare. You work on your plays. You get them out there as best you can. There are theaters in the sky. I am sure of it. I will be produced in one of them. They are waiting for me. Someday my time will come.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

I am having a Happy Mother's Day!

I just came back from breakfast with my SIL, Chad, grandsons, Jamal and Ethan, and Dan and Dante at the Good Egg, a family tradition on Mother's Day. Daughter Ronda was in San Diego to a dance convention. Jamal is getting ready to graduate and work his summer job at Water World. Dante said he was going to Los Angeles for the summer to stay with his Aunt Stephanie. His mom is moving to Mesa and needs to go to work.
Raymond and I just talked. He says spring has burst into bloom up in Utah. We had a good visit, too, about his future plans up there for the summer.
I will report here if I hear from anybody else. It is my granddaughter Kelly's birthday today, too, so her dad, my son Gary, might have plans to visit her.
I just had to snag this Happy Mother's day greeting that Connie posted with lilacs, my favorite flower. I don't see a lilac decoration very often. She also photographed beautiful lilac blooms. Happy Mother's Day, Connie! And all you mothers out there.
Later: Ronda called from San Diego to wish me a Happy Mother's Day. She and her pals from her dance club danced the west coast swing until 5am this morning. She said she was supposed to go to work at 5am Monday but asked her boss if he could reschedule her for Tuesday. Gary was the last to call and invited me to go to dinner tomorrow night. I think I will take him to my favorite restaurant downtown, Thai Elephant. They know how to cook tofu! Gary said his company is still getting work. Now I am watching golf.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Farmers Market Sunflower glory and what else is going on in my life?

I did enjoy this glorious bouquet at the Farmers Market Wednesday afternoon. I bought a heirloom tomato at $4.50 a pound to try and two tamales for supper which came to $5.30. After eating them I decided the heirloom was not a tomato I like enough to pay the price, so will go back to the clusters on the vine I usually get for $2.50 a pound. They remind me the most of the highly flavorful Utah tomatoes of my youth I can only dream about now as they are not to be had anywhere like those were. We used to sautee onions in butter and then cut up ripe tomatoes we had scalded for a few moments so we could take off the skin, and to my mind, there was no better supper.
I have reached a new milestone in my life the last few days. After a rough winter and pretty severe chronic fatigue symptoms I have decided to give up any thought of a 'full' relationship, in fact, I am going to try not to to even think about sex. I was ready to consider doing this sometime ago, but my body told me it was not ready. Now it is.
I think it was the meltdown of the man trying to kill himself that was the final deciding factor. This man has always had spark for me because he was sober, having fought his way back from another debilitating period of bingeing some years ago. But my last full blown relationship was such a strain that I gave it up sometime before that man developed lung cancer. I think now this was actually my swan song, my good-bye to sex.
Doc has been my refuge, which he has often claimed to be. I felt safe to develop a relationship with him just because he was an alcoholic who was too impaired for sex. With a disability like mine sex has been as risky as dancing. I had to give up dancing some years ago, after my last bad bout with chronic fatigue. I hung on to walking. You could control that. Although I have walked somewhere and had to sit down midway and wait for strength to go on.
So when do you give up sex for good? When you get scared it might kill you, that is when. So now I am only up for talking. Even my telepathic communications will be about talking. I am excited about that. For a long time sex has seemed to be kind of a useless thought, once very important in the process of having a family, but now seeming somewhat extraneous if only the body would decide to let go of that appetite. My passions have always been so strong unfortunately, for food, sex, anything else of an enjoyable nature, they have often been in danger of killing me before I could get them under control.
Ah, but now Doc has to be careful about the men I will be thinking about talking to! There are better talkers than he is, sober ones! He is already some nervous already about what this change in me has wrought. Yes, I will be lying awake imagining these fascinating discussions between me and other men. Instead of thinking about making love, I will be thinking about talking, talking, talking.
I am so excited. I feel I have been freed from my chain. I have moved on. Not always being tripped up by my body, but now more free to let my mind soar!

Monday, May 4, 2009

scarred to the bone

I never thought

I would be so glad

to see her

back from wherever

she had to go

the strength in her questions

about you

willing to put all jealousy

aside to welcome everyone

who wants you to live

into her circle

I knew that she could help you

after she said that you

bled in her car

when she was taking you

to the doctor

after that homeless guy

slashed your arm with a razor

I could not have done that

I do not have the strength

and you need someone strong

to help you now

someone who has seen you

at your worst

and still wants to help you

scarred to the bone

you dont have much of a shot

of living now

she is the one

you must lean on

I know she is your

only hope


Cheryl and Raymond busy tweaking Bohemian Cowboy play poster on family site

The poster is the latest version of one that will go up in a few weeks to advertize the two performance dates in Boulder. Since the population is relatively small there will be no point in running the production longer they feel. In the 'old' days, if you missed the play the night it was performed, too bad, that was it, making theater an even more precious night not to be missed after weeks of rehearsal.
I sent my play "Blue" to my niece Cheryl, written in honor of her mother when she was ill with cancer. She and her husband Steve are planning to move to Boulder in a few short weeks. They have a vacation home there they will now be living in full time. I will be very interested to see what they come up with in retirement in the way of projects at the Boulder Heritage Festival. I have also placed a link to the Festival website on my blog list, so you can see all that it consists of. They are all very excited this year about the "Ranching" theme as someone has made a map for them of who homesteaded property, who it was sold to, and so on. I am sure the property owners will take a lot of interest in these maps. They will also feature a panel of ranchers talking about ranching in Boulder, past and present.
The Anselm Spring Theater is on top of "Thompson Ledge." A spectacular road was built up to it by a local contracter. I grew up in our family home just to the west of this ledge, next door to the Thompson house. We never thought of such a thing as building a house up there because there was no water. But Anselm found a way to get water up there. The view is marvelous!

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Memorial Service for Bob Noyes at the WHo today

Here is an older photo of Bob with his parents who visited him often in the 18 years he lived here. His parents and sister came to lead a memorial service during which friends and resident pals shared their memories of him. Below is a photo of his sister who looked a lot like him. Another photo shows the group gathered in a circle.

I must pay tribute to a great horse, Mine that Bird!

I can't let a very exciting Kentucky Derby pass by without recognition. Damn, that was one spectacular win. I could almost have placed the cowboy trainer, Benny Wooley Jr., in Utah instead of coming all the way from New Mexico with this horse in a trailer, nursing a broken leg yet! The jockey, Calvin Borel, had never seen the horse until he arrived, but he was the very kind of rider to go to the inside rail and snake that horse through a hole just wide enough for him, and to a 50-1 long shot win, 6 and 3/4 lengths ahead, the second biggest upset in Kentucky Derby history! (Assault won by 8 lengths in 1946)
There is nothing like a great race to rekindle the excitement in horse racing. I posted the graphic above, sent me by Connie, another horse lover, with me about the age when I was still involved in cow punching for my dad and doing some mighty scary tasks to me out on the range.
I have always been grateful that I was raised with horses. But I could not spend my adult life with horses as my dad and grand dad did, along with many other ranchers and cowboys of that golden time. My dad sold out, as he knew that the day was coming when running cattle on the open range would be too much hassle to make it pay. And the work was so rough, he did not think it was a job for girls. I didn't either. After all, who would have the kids and do the cooking? He had no sons so if he wanted family company on the trails he made do with daughters.
Now there is only one rancher left in the Boulder-Escalante area who still runs cattle as he did in the 'old' days. Rugged Boulder land has been bought up by outsiders who have no interest in old time cow punching. Those days are gone, to live only in the memories of those who did the work.
My dad had a big interest in race horses, moved to Phoenix and bought land close to the track and built a house there. He claimed a horse in a race that won a few times and then got claimed again. But he was too old and decrepit to take care of horses anymore, so that part of his life he reluctantly let go.
Still he would have loved this race. He and my mother trekked back to Kentucky and went to the Derby one year. Anybody who loves horses as he did and taught me to love them, too, is always going to appreciate a great horse! Salute' Mine That Bird!

Saturday, May 2, 2009

On reading a tribal historian like Doris Lessing

I have looked for the novel, "The Golden Notebook" for years, but never found it at a price I could afford until the other day. Note that this woman, Doris Lessing, won the Nobel Prize for literature with this 635 page novel published in 1962 as the centerpiece of her work. The main thing I am finding so interesting about this novel is it features British characters who joined the communist party, full blown, with all their faults and failings. People got so frightened of the black lists and persecution they were afraid to write openly about having been a member of the party. Not Doris who does not let anything stop her, and the result is a delight. This novel is unlike any I have ever read about politics. I think it is closer to the truth than any novel I have read about the way people joined the party both in England and in the United States and how they dealt with the news of slave camps and liquidations that came out of Russia which began to trouble so many 'idealists'. I know I became disallusioned before I could ever be persuaded to join, even though some of my university friends did join. In fact, I think many of those who thought communism would be good for the poor especially with the distribution of the wealth became the inspiration of the far left liberals of today.
Having been poor most of my life, I was naturally very interested in any ideas about distributing the wealth, any system of beliefs that would value the poor as well as the rich citizens of the world, which out and out capitalism did not seem to do in the long run, as most Americans thought it would.
I do think, as a matter of fact, that the rich and the poor have never come closer to being on the same ground in this country as with this recession which has hit the wealthy hard as well as the poor. The middle class has also lost chunks of their savings through relying too heavily on the success of capitalism to keep their retirement investment in the stock markets safe. We have all been humbled, frightened, and disallusioned, rich and poor a like.
The only exceptions, of course, would be the really rich who may have taken off to Dubaii to live with their billions or south America, but they are the few.
So for me a novel is valuable that adds to my knowledge of the young intelligentsia like Doris Lessing would have been and how they viewed the distribution of the wealth in their time. And what they did with their ideas though the ideology of the communist party which was really quite laughable at times from her view, living as a communist while possessing the very human traits that always get us in trouble. Like inconsistency, instability of character and emotion, and inability to implement a system like communism into their 'real' and sometimes very chaotic lives.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Trials of the playwright with an alcoholic actor on board

I had some day yesterday having been called on the phone about 35 times by Doc who was agitated over the thoughts of doing this play reading (new to him) of "The Prince from Saturn" in which he would have to suggest the characters of a 22 year old retarded schizophrenic, a 14 year old 'bassetball' player, and an 18 year old high school jock. I admit this would be a stretch for any actor, let alone one 71 years old, but finally this morning he said he would do it, but he was going to need props, a 'bassetball', a werewolf mask of sorts, a baseball cap, etc. and I knew the theater place we could buy the mask, up on McDowell. I also need a doll to be the baby.
But Raymond called last night wanting a copy of "Happy Hello" as he has been talking to a group of men who are discussing building a theater up there, and he would like this script to show them. So I must hold up the reading until I can get that sent. In fact as soon as I get done with this entry I am going to send it off to him. Then I need to look for another script of Prnce from Saturn so I won't have to redo that one and use up my precious cartridge.
Raymond says he is having a hard time finding places he can access the Internet. He is playing guitar and singing about 4 nights a week at the Boulder Mountain Lodge, and he says he has been busy writing new songs for his job and the festival.
They are getting excited about the festival now. He has got a singer he met in Los Angeles who is from New Zealand coming to sing in it She is a recording artist who said she would help him all she could to promote his original songs. I know she will love Boulder. That is beautiful country.

Maggies ledge is the view from my niece Cheryl's Boulder vacation home. My sister LaRae bought the property and her husband built the house.


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