Friday, October 15, 2010

Christine and Shirley's Visit (3): My chatting to the girls about my bisexual father

I posted this segment of Doc's step-daughter visiting him after 20 years, bringing her cousin Shirley with her, because in it I asked Christine how much Doc drank when he was married to her mother. I was a little taken back at the answer, since Doc would never admit he was drinking heavily while he was married to any of his wives. But Christine still e-mailed Doc and told him she would like to keep in touch with him if he did not mind. I got told by Doc on camera during this video it was impossible to shut me up, but the reason why I no longer do videos with Doc is because with as much alcohol as he drinks he cannot get his thoughts together which makes me sometimes seem like a too talky aggressive female. There was nothing I could do about his alcohol problem so I decided to start interviewing sober people who have no problem in collecting their thoughts and dominating the video.
My sister wondered about me telling the girls the history of my life with a bisexual father. But I am the only sister who has a bisexual father. The others do not and probably never will.
That is the way bisexual fathers generally like it, they protect their secrets and lies. I just happened to get close enough to get suspicious, and thought that's what my dad was for 55 years before I ever introduced the idea to my sisters, who had not up to then ever suspected such a thing. Naturally they were not too pleased to have my idea laid on them. I told them to act like this is such a terrible awful thing for a man or woman to be is a form of prejudice. Prejudice is the reason people go so deep into the closet. Homosexuality is human. It does not make you the lowest human on earth as some people think.
As soon as I suspected, I started trying to figure out how he might have gone that road. I wondered if he was born with the tendency or had been introduced to it by older school boys and teens or by hired men devoid of women companions on his father's ranches. I started to convey to my suicidal father every way I could that even if he had same sex relations, I did not want him to commit suicide over it.
What people do not realize is that some are perfectly willing to do away with themselves if enough people are conveying to them that to be homosexual is to be totally terrible. That is why I get so angry when preachers single out homosexuals to call sinners. Not even those who are out pass muster. They don't seem to care about giving them more reason to feel suicidal. As hard as I worked to keep my father from committing suicide that makes me damned mad.
And there is no reward for being open and honest. I will say this, forcing people to hide their homosexual feelings puts children at risk far more, by not differentiating between pedofiles molesting children and adults engaging in homosexual relations. They are all lumped into the same sinner category.
I would say most of the old western outlaws were probably bisexual since women generally did not ride with them on the trails to commit robberies and the like. That probably contributed to the thinking that since they were the scum of the earth by engaging in homosexual relations, they just as well kill and rob and steal, take revenge on the society that condemned them to hell for that as much as any thing else. Some of the married bisexuals I have known have been some of the meanest men around. Including my dad. But I knew why he was so damned mean. It was defensive. If the bisexual also crosses over to become a child molester, you can bet he will be so mean that the whole town might be scared to death of him. And I would have to say that child molesters may be created by this feeling of being homosexual and worthless, so that one more crime does not matter. I would even go so far as to say that some child molesters are created by pushing the homosexual over the edge, by condemning him to hell. Women can become child molesters, too.
And most of the people around my dad would have looked down on him had they known the truth, even if he had been molested into homosexual relations when he was too young to defend himself. I would have to say that I thought my dad crossed the line at least in his mind and considered trying to molest his grandson and my son. I felt this was probably the culmination of a life time of feeling he had to hide what he was, homosexuality was so bad. I am sure other such grandfathers have done the same thing. We need to look at all possibilities, what makes a man or teen turn into a child molester. That probably happens in American many many times.
You have to differentiate between the child who now knows what it is to feel aroused by molesting and the molester who undoubtedly knows he or she is committing a crime. I usually say he because I would say it is more common for males to molest boys than it is for women to molest underage teens and children. And I would say that there is a line that is crossed when a homosexual or heterosexual turns into a child molester, and that we can contribute to that process if we, as a society, put too much pressure on people. Cause them to crack so to speak and be unable to refrain from doing something very wrong. If you say to the homosexual that every sexual thought he has is wrong if he acts on it, that means he has no outlet for his sexual feelings that is not considered wrong. That is a lot of pressure! It is no wonder that some may start molesting children, become opportunists who take advantage of whatever comes their way even if the person is underage or a child.
Prejudice can contribute to child molesting! And if child molesters are not detected or punished, this can also lead to some deciding it is not so bad, and nobody is paying any attention, anyway.
The gay community takes it upon themselves to become responsible members of society. If they become alienated by the lack of acceptance from the rest of society that process is interrupted. All because the majority of religious preachers cannot change their ideas from biblical times in the way they view homosexuality. In two thousand years, no progress???
As for God the creator, do you think he does not know how a homosexual is created, and do you think he does not love all his children? I think his creator loved my father and I could do no less, forgive him for his sins, react when he did something wrong, but still love him. To me that is real religion. Prejudice and rejection spread by the 'religious' is wrong.
Thinking members of any church need to convey to some of these old men that their 'biblical' attitudes are not acceptable. The bible can and is used to justify any kind of preaching, however hurtful. This Boyd Packer I watched on TV ought to be banned by his own Mormon church members from speaking about homosexuality. He is doing more harm than good.

And now as an antidote to Doc's video and my discussion, here is my friend Connie's latest video of photos taken from her home! It is a work of art, somehow very moving with the music Connie has chosen to accompany these majestic photos. See more of Connie's work in her blog "Connie's Place" on my blog list.

1 comment:

salemslot9 said...

you can't have
a monogamus relationship
if you're supposedly

what do they do?
wake up and
flip a coin?

bisexual = gay


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