Life is complicated, so blogging is necessary for me to be able to figure it out

I just talked to my son Raymond for about an hour who has been asked to do a workshop on blogging for the Writer's Workshop the Boulder Heritage Foundation has been doing in October. My niece Cheryl is the administrator and organizer. She and my niece Camille and my sister Ann have all worked hard on the books the foundation has published every year and offered for sale to the summer festival in July. So far they have done "Homesteads, Ranches, Home", which is a history of the land of Boulder from 1879 to 2009. I love picking up this book and reading it over and over, as I keep running onto new information in it I did not know before, for it is a history of every land property and different owners of it to the present time.
They have done a history of Boulder schools and all the students who attended. Last summer they did "Women" which consisted of histories of different women who have lived in Boulder over the years. Some histories were not included as their relatives or someone else did not write and submit one, which is why they are planning a second volume to include more of the ones who got left out. They have also published a cookbook with original paintings included by an artist who lives there which I thought were a plus. My sister Ann is preparing a book called "The Grand Stair Case is My Home" complete with photographs which will be published under the auspices of the foundation we will soon be able purchase. I can't wait!
So Raymond is thinking about his reasons for blogging. And I thought about how complicated life is, requiring me to keep blogging to try to figure it out.

For example I am having a heck of a time figuring out the political scene, and I think everyone else is quite confused, too. I am a pro life democrat, so I have to figure out who I can vote for that is pro life while still maintaining my democratic party membership. I have taken to crossing over and voting for a pro life republican even if I am not sure that candidate really means it. If he is willing to make it part of his platform I have decided to support him or her rather than a pro choice candidate. For example I will vote for Janet Brewer for Governor of Arizona in a couple of weeks because I know her pro life record and it is a good one. I know Terry Goddard supports pro choice. He is not a pro life democratic candidate. There don't seem to be many of those, confessed that is, at the moment, but there are Christian democrats who could conceivably reject pro choice and demand pro life candidates. Most of them seem to be staying silent. All democrats seem to be wavering now days about beliefs in God, Jesus, heaven or anything of a religious nature if it does not jive with choice. No wonder Obama is being accused of reneging on his promise to recognize the religious element in the country more. Maybe his democratic supporters won't allow him to, but Michael Gerson of the Washington post was worried today that his lack of support of the religious faction might cost him the election. I am worried, too, as I think Obama is a smart guy, but he is going to have to convince his supporters they may need to respect religion a little more if they want to help him get re-elected. There are enough religious people in this country, that the liberals need to keep that in mind. If they are not willing to support enough of the people's agenda, how can they possibly ensure their president the next election? This is practical politics.
Pro choice democrats may need to respect pro life democrats and republicans more if they are to convince the populace they are going to be more tolerant of religion. Although nobody is talking much about it, a too rigid support of pro choice may be anathema enough to the religious to affect the election. Just how much does being pro choice mean to the democrats, more than winning the election?
So goes the party so Obama has to go or he would be out of step with his own party, the people who nominated him.

I have thought that liberal democrats have tended to be disrespectful of religion with a too fierce defense of pro choice. I have also read quite a few sneers from democrats about the intelligence of some republicans. It appears that democrats sneer at those they disagree with while pro life activists pray for them. Some republicans, however, get very angry and insulting too. They don't seem to be able to confine themselves to praying for the liberals. I don't even listen to talk show radio hosts on the right like Michael Savage who is savage indeed in his criticisms of liberals.
I need to blog almost daily to keep up with what is happening on the political scene. I have tried to include every kind of blog on my blog list so I can keep track of what everyone's ideas are, including the Atheist's blog and Truthout which is blogging for the liberals in case you don't know, while Sibby Online is a republican conservative blogger who is very critical of the liberals. He is pro life. I try to include blogs from the left and blogs from the right, and when an interesting blog headline comes up I rush to read the latest. I have Christian bloggers on my blog list as well as atheist bloggers which include great physicists in their latest video each saying they don't believe in God. We have Christopher Hitchens, a famous atheist, who says he is resigned to not being here any more after he dies, since he does not believe we can possibly survive death and neither do a whole lot of physicists. I am still trying to find some physicists who learn toward an afterlife and so far haven't found any.
But I happen to think that imagination plays a big part in creation, so whatever we imagine over and over again down through history just might be the catalyst to creating a hereafter based in the imagination. A powerful idea might be able to take on a life of its own. I have read books about physicists over and over because I like to turn their ideas over in my mind some even if I am not smart enough to understand them. I ran on to the idea in one of these books that physicists discovered the act of thinking could affect particles in quantum mechanics. I loved this idea that the act of thinking could affect the components of our universe. I do not think this idea has been explored nearly enough.
I, for example, had a near death experience in which a light started to appear to me above as I was going completely numb to pain and I began to perceive a figure in this light that I 'recognized' as Jesus Christ. Since I was being murdered, I felt that Jesus himself had come to see what he could do to save me. My husband had attacked me when he was crazy drunk, and he was also a descendant of the brother of the prophet Joseph Smith who founded the Mormon Church, and had quite a lot of religion in him. He had his hands around my throat ready to squeeze after he had tortured me for 5 hours. I stopped feeling pain and began to feel ecstasy because I 'knew' I was going home to God if I did indeed die. I am sure the happiness about seeing Jesus was reflected in my eyes and my husband saw the ecstasy and dropped his hands and threw me back on the bed. He said, "I would kill you but it would not do any good." I was naturally very relieved when he left me alone to recover because I was pregnant and wanted to stay on this earth and have my baby instead of going home to God.
He claimed not to remember any of this. He was always in a blackout when he was acting totally violent and crazy. I think he disconnected himself from the memory, so he would not feel so responsible.
But where did the light come from? Why did I think it was Jesus? I 'knew' at the moment of dying I had a soul and I was on the verge of leaving my body. I was 21 years old at the time. I still don't know as I believe that Jesus was the actual son of God in some way any more than any other men are the sons of God. I believe that by his compassion and work he earned his role as a great leader and savior of mankind.
I have also read about children seeing Mary, the Mother of Christ, when they were being tortured. I think it stands to reason that she, too, would be a figure who would transcend death and appear to those about to be tortured to death who had a special feeling for her.
I have always had very strong feelings for Christ who has inspired generations with stories about his life. I think he is a powerful spirit to come when the worst thing is going on to try to intervene.
Have any of these physicists ever been on the verge of death? If so what did they see? I report what I saw and felt.
I have no doubt that if I had been killed I would have left my body and gone with the figure in the light to a place that looked like a heaven. I have read other accounts from people who were even declared dead who went further into a place they perceived was heaven, and when they revived came back to earth again and told about it. I never lost consciousness throughout my near death experience. I read about a guy who was struck by lightning who experienced all this, and described the wonderful buildings in this place called heaven he visited. I am always very interested in near death experiences and what people see when they are hovering between life and death. And return to tell us about it. How do physicists explain these experiences?
So that is why I have to keep blogging every day to figure all these mysteries out. As I say life is complicated!