Friday, December 5, 2008

III- Do we judge the victims of molestation?

If early molestation has anything to do with sexual orientation aren't we judging the victim and thus victimizing them again. I always had some sympathy for both my dad and my granddad, because I felt that they were both constrained from ever talking about what had happened to them on their journey through hazardous childhoods that may have determined the behavior of the men, even if married with children. I am sure both hoped that marriage might somehow cure them, but when it didn't society was incapable of wanting the truth let alone dealing with it with fairness. I knew very well from what happened with my male cousins on Grandpa's ranch that boys may have been regarded as sexual objects, not only on that ranch but others ranches that I knew about. Some ranch owners were of course completely normal and these problems did not arise among their children. I felt I got targeted when I was doing boys work, which caused me to think hard about what boys born into such circumstances had to contend with. My grandfather's dad was a sport, an alcoholic as well as a big property owner who made a fortune and lost it due to his vices. He expected a lot of his son who took care of the family the rest of his life after his father died relatively young.

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